| Written by Abel Rodriguez |
| WASILLA, Alaska - Madonna, fresh from dumping baseball superstar A-Rod and Brazilian super model Jesus Luz has reportedly been seen having dinner with none other than Levi Johnston, 18, the ex-future son-in-law of Gov. Sarah Palin. Johnston uncaringly dumped his fiancee Bristol Palin, 18, after she had their baby back in December. He told a neighbor that he does not think that he is ready to settle down with just one girl just yet. An aide to Gov. Palin stated off the record that the governor had commented to Levi that he had better not dare set foot on her property because as far as she is concerned he looks a hell of a lot like a moose. Levi replied that he has seen "Snowflake" Sarah shoot and she is not at all as good a shot as she thinks she is. He told of a hunting trip that just he and her took up around Prudhoe Bay. He said that they both snuck up on a caribou and Palin took careful aim, fired, and missed causing the caribou to scamper off into the frozen woods. Johnston said that when Palin fired her high-powered telescopic rifle that the end of the rifle was practically touching the caribou's butt. Levi was asked if he in fact has been seeing Madonna. And he asked "Who?" When told that there were reports circulating throughout Wasilla that he and the famous singer had both been seen at the local Jack-In-The-Box where he works he remarked, "Where?" When Levi was asked if he was born stupid, is stupid, or just acts stupid he answered, "What?" A reporter for The Wasilla Snowdrift Sentinel managed to talk to Madonna and she asked her point blank if she was dating the ex-boyfriend of Governor Sarah Palin's heartbroken daughter Bristol. Madonna replied that Bristol was not heartbroken because the little spoiled brat unfairly kept the entire $300,000 that the couple was paid for the first photos of their little baby Tripp Easton Mitchell Johnston, who grandma Sarah has nicknamed "Huntin' Tripp." Madonna then admitted that since the government of Malawi had denied her adoption request, she had decided to fly to Alaska and see about the possibility of adopting an Eskimo baby where all a prospective parent has to do is fill out a two question questionaire, pay a $3 adoption fee, and show at least one valid credit card. She said that she had stopped in at the local Jack-In-The-Box and that Levi had gone up to her as she was eating her Ultimate Cheeseburger and asked her for her autograph. Madonna said that she happened to know that he loved hockey and she offered to have him meet her in her Holiday Inn room so that he could tell her all about hockey related terms such as body checking, penalty box, biscuit in the basket, pole checking, and dangler. Madonna and Johnston were later seen together at the Greater Wasilla Unified Airport and Madonna confessed that her and Levi are in fact dating. She disclosed that they were both flying back to New York City and that she had hired him to be her personal ice hockey consultant and instructor on her new movie. (EDITOR'S NOTE: In May, Madonna will begin filming Puck Bunny - The Misadventures of An Ice Hockey Groupie. The motion picture will also star Brad Pitt, Carrie Underwood, Roger Clemens, Nadya Suleman, Miley Cyrus, Tony Bennett, and Pucky the Puck, mascot of The Saskatoon Snowplowers). |
Liberal Christians
Also sometimes referred to as secular, modern, or humanistic. This is an umbrella term for Protestant denominations, or churches within denominations, that view the Bible as the witness of God rather than the word of God, to be interpreted in its historical context through critical analysis. Examples include some churches within Anglican/Episcopalian, Lutheran, Methodist, Presbyterian, and United Church of Christ. There are more than 2,000 Protestant denominations offering a wide range of beliefs from extremely liberal to mainline to ultra-conservative and those that include characteristics on both ends.
| • | Belief in Deity Trinity of the Father (God), the Son (Christ), and the Holy Spirit that comprises one God Almighty. Many believe God is incorporeal. |
| • | Incarnations Beliefs vary from the literal to the symbolic belief in Jesus Christ as God's incarnation. Some believe we are all sons and daughters of God and that Christ was exemplary, but not God. |
| • | Origin of Universe and Life The Bible's account is symbolic. God created and controls the processes that account for the universe and life (e.g. evolution), as continually revealed by modern science. |
| • | After Death Goodness will somehow be rewarded and evil punished after death, but what is most important is how you show your faith and conduct your life on earth. |
| • | Why Evil? Most do not believe that humanity inherited original sin from Adam and Eve or that Satan actually exists. Most believe that God is good and made people inherently good, but also with free will and imperfect nature, which leads some to immoral behavior. |
| • | Salvation Various beliefs: Some believe all will go to heaven, as God is loving and forgiving. Others believe salvation lies in doing good works and no harm to others, regardless of faith. Some believe baptism is important. Some believe the concept of salvation after death is symbolic or nonexistent. |
| • | Undeserved Suffering Most Liberal Christians do not believe that Satan causes suffering. Some believe suffering is part of God's plan, will, or design, even if we don't immediately understand it. Some don't believe in any spiritual reasons for suffering, and most take a humanistic approach to helping those in need. |
| • | Contemporary Issues Most churches teach that abortion is morally wrong, but many ultimately support a woman's right to choose, usually accompanied by policies to provide counseling on alternatives. Many are accepting of homosexuality and gay rights. |
Wednesday, April 08, 2009
Madonna Dating Levi Johnston

LeviLevi Johnston's Sister Mercede Tattoos His Name On Her Wrist...What Would You Do?
White trash hick Sarah Palin from Mat-Su thinks that Levi Johnston is white trash. Sarah Palin lies again. Levi Johnston calls Sarah Palin a liar.

WASHINGTON — The father of Bristol Palin's baby boy says he's been treated like an outcast since the end of Gov. Sarah Palin's run for vice president.
Appearing in an interview broadcast Wednesday on CBS's "The Early Show," Levi Johnston said he felt a need to "get my side of the story out there."
A worsening feud has developed between the 19-year-old Johnston and the governor's family in the wake of Johnston's complaints about not being able see his young son Tripp, often enough. Now there is a dispute about whether Johnston had actually lived with the Palins. Palin denies that he did; Johnston's family says the Palins are lying.
Johnston says that the biggest misconception about him is that his family is "probably that my family's white trash." He called the Palins "snobby."
Bristol Palin is Sarah Palin's daughter, and at one point she had agree to marry Johnston, but that is now off. Johnston said he was heartbroken by the split.
Johnston said he "wouldn't call any baby a mistake. I love him more than anything. I wouldn't trade him for the world." Tripp was born Dec. 27.
Lower class hick, Sarah Palin from Mat-Su fails again

Forget “Drill, baby, drill.” Sarah Palin says she’s building a $40 billion gas pipeline, which even President Obama wants. The only problem: It isn’t there. And it’s her fault.
Lower class hick, Sarah Palin from Mat-Su fails again.
Monday, April 06, 2009
Sarah Palin allowed Bristol to have sex in her home. Todd Palin's sister arrested for breaking into a house while her 4 year old kept a look out .
Bristol Palin’s ex-boyfriend and the father of her baby, Levi Johnston, 18, told Tyra Banks in a segment to air today that he was “pretty sure” Bristol’s mother knew that he and Bristol, 18, were having sex before she got pregnant. Alaskan governor and former Vice Presidental candidate Sarah Palin is an advocate of abstinence-only sex education and didn’t take kindly to Johnston blabbing to the media. She issued a scathing statement to People Magazine that said in no uncertain terms how she felt about Johnston’s claims:
After taking about sex on The Tyra Banks Show, Johnston – the 18-year-old father of Bristol Palin’s baby – was hit with a blistering response from Bristol’s family.
“Bristol did not even know Levi was going on the show. We’re disappointed that Levi and his family, in a quest for fame, attention, and fortune, are engaging in flat-out lies, gross exaggeration, and even distortion of their relationship,” says the statement from the Palin family rep, Meghan Stapleton.
“Bristol’s focus will remain on raising Tripp, completing her education, and advocating abstinence,” the statement continues. “It is unfortunate that Levi finds it more appealing to exploit his previous relationship with Bristol than to contribute to the well being of the child.”
The statement ends, saying, “Bristol realizes now that she made a mistake in her relationship and is the one taking responsibility for their actions.”
[From People.com]
Not only does Sarah Palin have this embarrassing incident to deal with, she may have another black sheep in her family. Palin’s sister-in-law, Diana Palin, was arrested on burglary charges in Wasilla, Alaska on Thursday and charged with two counts of felony burglary after she was caught breaking into a home for an alleged second time. Diana Palin’s four year old daughter is said to have been waiting in the car outside while her mom robbed the house, taking a reported $2,200 in her first attempt and $400 the next time. Her excuse was that she thought she was at a friend’s place.
Sunday, April 05, 2009
Sarah Palin angry that Levi took advantage of Bristol and impregnated her
Sarah Palin allowed Bristol to have sex in her home
Sarah Palin blasts Levi Johnston for talking about relationship with her daughter Bristol
Levi Johnston -- Bristol Palin's former boyfriend and the father of her baby -- has made her lipstick-wearing pit bull mother biting mad.
Johnston tells Tyra Banks on her show (that airs on April 6) that he believes Gov. Sarah Palin knew darn well he and her daughter were having sex when they lived in her house. "I'm pretty sure she probably knew. Moms are pretty smart," Johnston says.
News of his sex chat with Tyra has hit the ears of the Alaska governor.
And you betcha her camp has released an angry hornet’s nest of a statement.
"Bristol did not even know Levi was going on the show. We're disappointed that Levi and his family, in a quest for fame, attention, and fortune, are engaging in flat-out lies, gross exaggeration and even distortion of their relationship," says the statement from the Palin family rep.
"It is unfortunate that Levi finds it more appealing to exploit his previous relationship with Bristol than to contribute to the well-being of the child."
The statement ends: "Bristol realizes now that she made a mistake in her relationship and is the one taking responsibility for their actions."
It's kinda funny that she's mad at him for talking about having sex with her daughter. We would have been madder about the actual act of impregnation.
As if poor Sarah doesn’t have enough family problems. Now comes word this week from the Associated Press that her husband Todd Palin’s half-sister was accused of breaking into the same Wasilla, Alaska, house twice to steal money.
Yes, you read that right. The same house. Twice.
Diana Palin, 35, was charged with felony burglary and misdemeanor criminal trespass and theft stemming from two break-ins this week. And don't forget that Levi's mom, Sarah, was arrested in December on drug-related charges.
What is going on with these people? They make The Osbournes seem positively sane and normal.
We know. Let's move out the "Desperate Housewives" and have the Osbournes, the Palins and Nadya Suleman all live on Wisteria Lane and just let the cameras roll. The writers could all take a break because these folks come up with such wacky stuff all on their own.
Now that would be a TV show to watch. Would you tune in? Or are you over these people?

